It's my culture shock, and I'll cry if I want to

Which I did a fair amount of for at least a month, if not more.

So the theory is that once most people get to a new place they go through a Honeymoon period, then start to feel the differences, then get used to it, only to feel the differences again and finally move into a comfort zone.

The other night, while Mike was on a business trip to the South of Laos, he was telling me over the phone he had heard about culture shock and while it wasn't the same for everyone and I'm not completely by the book, he thinks I've moved into a comfort zone...lets hope.

I for sure did not go through my honeymoon stage, I went straight into crisis mode. Could be the way I'll always feel when moving to a new place, or the fact that I'd just had a baby and moved across the world, either way I'm sad to know that I didn't get the euphoria.

My sister-in-law asked me if I wanted to yell at people for their well meaning comments on my Facebook status updates when I was going through a very rough time...yes, yes I did want to yell and more. But I also admitted if I didn't want well meaning comments I could stop posting to Facebook.

So only 3-months into our assignment I might not LOVE it here, but I'm starting to figure out how to deal and hope I continue to.

in case you don't know me

I complain, A LOT! Really I am pretty sure it was pointed out to my husband one night years ago and yet he's still here.

Not only do I complain a lot, I also tend to stick my foot in my mouth quite often so don't take offense, I have a condition called never thinks before speaking.

While I've had a very hard time adjusting to life in a new country, my blogs may make it seem like I blame other people...no, I'm really not. I am aware that I didn't prepare myself enough for such a move and expected way more than is apparently normal. Living at Oakwood for over a year was like living in a bubble. It was easy to make friends, there were things going on all the time and shopping close by, insanely I thought all posts would be similar to living at Oakwood, crazy I know.

I've realized that everyday will be a learning experience and I'm trying very hard to take things in stride, but it's much easier said than done... Sometimes I just need a good vent.

 

Updated 7 ways I know it's growing on me

As usual, I wrote this blog in a sloppy and fast way, leaving me feeling unsatisfied and thinking more about things I'm getting used to. So in the middle of the night as I'm cleaning up leaky boob mess, I added a few things. I also realize some of these may need an explanation.

Here is my list of ways I know Laos is growing on me; I'll probably still feel like I left something out:

1. My new scent is a mix of DEET, citronella and baby powder
2. Going over 30mph makes me feel like I'm speeding
3. I prefer to draw a map vs give directions
4. *It no longer makes me feel awkward when women grab their breasts while they speak to me.
5. I now prefer ice in my beer
6. Car seats have become a use 'em if you got 'em thing of the past.
7. lastly I don't jump when I see a spider the size of a turtle running around on my wall.

* This is because I usually have a chubby baby attached to me and even if they can speak English, women grab their breasts to ask how I feed the baby. Sometimes I want to tell my housekeeper that she doesn't have to squeeze her boob when she tells me she thinks my baby is hungry, but oh well.

Boun Bang Fai

Rocket Festival for us English speakers.

Yesterday Mike took us and a few other Embassy employees, as well as the Ambassador to Nasawn to part take in Boun Bang Fai festivities. The mail clerk at the embassy was gracious enough to open his home to us and let us crash his party.

From what I understand the purpose of the rockets is to penetrate the sky and let the rains fall; the symbol of the raining season. I could be wrong, this is just what I remember Mike telling me last year while showing us videos of some of the rockets.

To see wikipedia history: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/rocket_festival

This is one of the most bawdy and sexually orientated festivals, but after experiencing Pi Mai Lao, I'm starting to think they all are. Men dress as women and dance in the streets, or like yesterday on Floats.

It was a good time, but I feel no amount of planning would've prepared us this time. Next time I will not go to the rocket field, I'll bring a fan and take the water out of the car. We did stay fairly hydrated, but left the party w/o our water bottles and the heat was just too intense. It was also much, much louder than I imagined. It sounded a lot like jets flying right over our heads.

Mike enjoyed himself, as usual. He always seems to take delight in activities that cause me to lose my shit.

So no more rambling; here are the pictures Mike took.

One of the rockets passing in a parade.

Some monks had a rocket :)

Finn got his own rocket too

Right about now I started to lose my shit

ready to scream

So this past week in Vientiane we've had quite a bit of rain. My helper has told me this isn't the rainy season, but it's coming, and quickly. With said rain, we've had many, many mosquitoes. For those not up to speed on this area of the world, mosquitoes here carry lots of scary things. So we always, always sleep under nets and I spray the kids with a non-deet product every day, twice a day, but fear this may not be enough, that one day the 104 fever one of my kids has is not just a random virus, but Dengue! So when I complain about this issue, I would feel it's justified to have people understand my fears and frustrations.





I am constantly seeking out standing water in my yard, which there seems to be a lot of, but that doesn't seem to be our problem lately, it's inside the house. Mainly centered in 1 bathroom that is always in use, but also in our kids room (hence my fears). One frustration is that many people are offering short term solutions to a LONG term problem. Vientiane isn't going away, mosquitoes aren't either; giving me a can of spray or having a company come fog the house isn't going to find the root of the problem.





I'm starting to realize, while I hate short term solutions, my real frustration is that I have no clue how to explain that there is a problem IN my house, and I can't say hey this is where it's coming from, I see this as an issue, do this to fix it. Nope, I am no expert, all I know is I have a problem and I need help.

We aren't in D.C. anymore

Ah Saturday morning started off as a normal Saturday. Drinking coffee, watching TV, and checking Facebook. We were supposed to spend it hanging out with friends at the playground and pool while Mike help build a playground (too bad you can't hear my giggles). But Saturday decided to be a rainy day, so I thought it'd be a great day to attempt our first border crossing as a family. Note I say as a family because my first attempt failed. We only had to do it and be back by 4 p.m. because Mike and I had a ball to attend later that night.

So we grab the kids a few cloth inserts for diapers and jump in the car; how hard could it be. HA! So in all it took 2-hours to cross the Friendship Bridge from Laos to Thailand. Mike and I were running back and forth in the rain from 1 window to another trying to figure out what the heck we were supposed to be doing, as soon as we were finished with the border we got to Udon Thani in no time; awesome. And even found the one store we were looking for; even more awesome. That was about as awesome as it was though.

We found the store got most of what we were looking for only to find out that it was CASH only? WTF? A little heads up would have been nice. They ended up taking our credit for the electronics, but nothing else so Mike had to look for an ATM to get some Baht out. No probs, in the mean time the kids have vandalized the store, all the while screaming how hungry they were...heck I was too!

Ah thankfully there's a McDonalds down the road. Really a McDonalds! But for those of you who know Mike know there would be NO McDonalds indulgence. Oh how I wanted that cheeseburger...

Anyway, we found food and headed home, did I mention we had a very specific time limit because Mike and I had a ball to go to., but we kept getting turned around and Maggie kept complaining of a tummy ache. She's fine I kept telling Mike, she just wants to get out of her seat, but right as I finish that sentence she threw up all over herself. ACK! I undress her and hold her on my lap to calm her. As we were finally figuring out where we were and how to get to the main road I feel a rumble in Maggie's tummy, and reach for the door. Too late, she yakked all over me! I look over to Mike and scream at him to get us out of there!!

Lesson learned: A. Remember notes to self on things to carry in the car. B. We are not in D.C. anymore, 10-minutes of planning might go along way.

In the end we made it home with enough time for me to wash the puke off and put a dress on.

In the end I think we looked pretty good :)

Playgroup

This morning as my car is refusing to run properly, as the kids are screaming they are hot and poor Tess is dripping wet, I decided that Tuesday morning playgroup has become my CURSE.

Every week I have big plans of getting out there and socializing with other moms in Vientiane, but every Tuesday for the past 2 months something happens to prevent me from going. Most of them have been minor and in the end we benefited from me not going, but today was not one of those days.


Today my battery light turned on. So as I am trying to get Finn to school in rush hour traffic (not such a rush) I was trying to look in my book to see what that meant. I was really hoping it just meant I had to keep my car on so the battery would charge, but alas it could have been many, many different things. Stupid me turned the car off when I took Finn in and when I got back to the car it started, but everything that runs off the battery was not working, ie AC, power locks POWER WINDOWS. So, not only did we not have AC but we also didn't have the ability to roll down the windows. Not knowing if I was actually in drive I pull out of the school and frantically call Mike; who casually answers the phone to tell me I seem to always call him at that exact time everyday...I not so casually tell him that's because everyday at that time I have a problem. Anyway he directs me to the Toyota dealership that is really close to our house and tells me everyone seems to have this problem when they get their car the battery needs a charge or replacement should be a quick fix...


Famous last words! 3 hours, 2 meltdowns, lots of money spend on a new battery and a horrible English translation - leading me to believe I might not drive my car for 3-months - later the car is still not in my driveway.


Oh the taste of freedom was so sweet...

Note to self: things to keep in the car

Now that we have a car, I have started to write my list of things I need to keep in the car and it just keeps growing.

1. Water; check
2. Diapers; check
3. Wipes; check
4. toilet paper; wha
5. change of clothes for everyone; almost check
6. extra shoes for Maggie; wha
7. umbrella; whoops should'a known that
8. Sunscreen and bug spray; check and check (it's all-in-one)
9. snacks; check
10. sanity; nope long gone

If at first you don't succeed...

Try, try again? or just say screw it and grab a beer :)

Since I've gotten to Laos, I've found that no matter what I'm doing, it doesn't work the first time.

The first time I left the hotel by myself, I quit and went back because it was so hot. FAIL

The first time I attempted to do a group outing I was forgotten about. FAIL

The first time I left the house with a mission I got horribly lost, not to mention stuck. FAIL

The first time I tried to gain freedom by buying a bike, it broke. FAIL

The first time I tried to cross the friendship bridge into Thailand I didn't have the right papers. FAIL

It took me about 2 months to figure out how to get around with the kids using different transportation methods and when each would work best. People gave us rides; Tuk Tuks, Taxis, the stroller, a wagon and most of all our own two feet.

So after many, many times trying to do something and failing the first time, I've learned not to give up because eventually something will work....or I can just go to the neighbors for an ice cold Beer Lao and forget about it :)

What were you doing?

Today marked a historical time for Americans and people world wide! Osama Bin Laden was killed! Hip hip hooray! As I sit and watch the continuous news feed on this historical event, I hear the news casters constantly remind us that we will forever remember what we were doing when we heard the news...


Almost 10 years ago tragedy hit us. I was a sophomore in high school and like most teenagers decided it was just a bad day to go to school and wanted to sleep in. I was woken up at 7 a.m. by my mom telling me we'd been attacked. Living on the west coast at the time we were 3 hours behind NYC. It was an awful, awful day. Very emotional and I remember crying for months reading stories of people who'd lost their loved ones on that horrific day. Three years later I decided to join the United States Army. I wanted to prove to everyone I knew, I was strong enough and also to serve my country. Today Osama Bin Laden was killed in Pakistan, what was I doing 10 years later? Trying to cross the Friendship bridge at the Lao Thai border. It will be something I won't forget, but how I would have liked to be closer to more Americans who felt the feelings I'm feeling. I have many feelings about this day, so many it's hard to explain. Lots of pride, and truimph, but also grief. Serving 5 years in the Army, doing the job I was doing, I saw first hand how these wars were effecting people, mostly the people left behind. So while I write this I toast the men and women who laid down their lives to make this day happen. 10 years in the making, we caught and killed the man who managed to continue to hurt us long after his attack.

So, as we all celebrate this accomplishment don't forget just how much it took to acheive this. Sons, daughters, wives, mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers are without loved ones tonight.

R.I.P.
Adam David Quinn and James P. Hunter
and the 5,886 men and women who've made the ultimate sacrifice.